It doesn't happen often, but it does happen — people see my son Paul and ask if they can pray for him.

At places like WalMart (where it has happened) I usually accept their offer after quietly and quickly assessing their motives and authenticity. And people are usually appropriate.

But a scenario occurred recently where I struggled to respond graciously. The Holy Spirit helped me in that moment as I could feel my pride being challenged. Here’s the story. 

A Prayer for Healing

We got to our church service a few minutes late. I plopped Paul down in the seats just outside the sanctuary while we got our bearings on who was going where. A gentleman noticed Paul and asked me what "disease"…

Continue Reading →

When the Journal of Medical Ethics released the article, “What makes killing wrong?” in January, they set off a mini-storm of outrage and controversy.  The authors, from Duke University and the National Institutes of Health, asserted that ‘universally and irreversibly disabled people’ could be killed for the sake of retrieving their organs for people who are not totally disabled.

On the whole, the issue raised is when it becomes appropriate to retrieve organs from one person for the sake of another. The governing rule that a person must be dead before vital organs can be removed, known as the ‘dead donor rule,’ has many difficult aspects to it that make even its proponents uncomfortable.

…

Continue Reading →

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. (Galatians 6:9)

January 22 makes the 39th anniversary of the United States Supreme Court ruling that overturned every state law governing abortion in America. 

39 years is a long time.

Yet that horrible decision effected one positive move: Bible-believing churches got off the sidelines. Today, it would be hard to find any American who is uncertatin about the Evangelical stance on abortion: it's evil.

Today, But Not Always

I say "today" because that's not always been the case. In fact, the eugenics and abortion movements in the United States successfully enlisted religious leaders — mo…

Continue Reading →

Every January we rightly turn our attention to Roe v. Wade — the poorly argued Supreme Court decision that was driven by ideology rather than by actual case law.

It was not the first unjustly decided case that impacted tens of thousands of vulnerable lives.

In the early decades of the 20th century in the United States, there were deeply held prejudices against the three types of people: the poor, those with disabilities of all kinds, and people of color. These prejudices, along with their social and scientific acceptability, made up the fabric of what became known as the eugenics movement.

The argument went something like this: if only we could prevent the births of ‘feeble-minded’ peo…

Continue Reading →

There is a murderous logic to those who advocate aborting children with disabilities. It goes something like this:

• People with disabilities suffer in this world. Abortion is a kindness that prevents such suffering.
• The caregivers (primarily parents) of children with disabilities also suffer.  Abortion is a kindness that prevents their suffering, too.
• Society suffers. Financially and administratively, the burden on society is significant. Abortion is a kindness to the rest of society to prevent such a burden from existing.

The argument has become more sophisticated over time, but the main point is this idea of preventing hardship. Everybody just wants to be comfortable. We like things…

Continue Reading →

A true story and an example to emulate. . . .

Kristina (my niece) is a young woman with a complicated life. 

She was born with a rare genetic disorder that resulted in orthopedic issues across her entire body alongside limited intellectual capacities. She has undergone dozens of surgeries, has endured countless medical tests and hospitalizations, and will always need someone to look out for her. She is very vulnerable and her behaviors can be challenging.

She attends a church of about 200 people. 

What if you were her pastor? You barely have the resources, both financial and human, to serve the needs of the ‘normal’ folks in your congregation. How do you love her and prepare her fo…

Continue Reading →

As the father of a child with severe disabilities, one of the things I am asked frequently is "what can I do for you?" I can understand that. We are oriented toward action. And if we can’t be doing something for another person, then it can feel like we aren’t really expressing our care.

But sometimes the "doing" is actually trusting and resting in something other than ourselves.

Like the word of God.

A Thanksgiving Reflection

Last week Joe Scheumann, Development Assistant at Desiring God, wrote a Thanksgiving reflection for Desiring God’s prayer and donor society, the Philippian Fellowship. I was looking for a pleasant, appropriate, God-centered piece to encourage our friends in thi…

Continue Reading →

The topic of the new heaven and new earth is a popular one with some of the people we hang out with. As you can probably guess, they also have children with severe disabilities. There is comfort in thinking about our children being free from their limitations and pain.

But this hope can be dangerous, too. We envision heaven to be a wonderful place, full of freedom and laughter and conversation. No more seizures! Legs that can walk! Eyes that see!

And nothing about Jesus.

Does that thought make you recoil in horror? Can you imagine eternity without Jesus?

The Benefits Without the Person

For a long time I did just that. I wanted the benefits of Jesus’ work, but it didn’t really matt…

Continue Reading →

Pastor, this is my personal invitation for you to come to the 2012 Conference for Pastors on God, Manhood & Ministry: Building Men for the Body of Christ. Fathers of children with disabilities need you to really get biblical manhood. 

Who Am I?

On the evening of July 4, 1995 I stood outside Fairview Riverside Hospital, watching the rain pour down in sheets. My life felt like it was over.  My son had been born less than 10 hours before and we knew he was blind. And we had been warned there could be other things "wrong" with him.

I stood there thinking, "who am I?" I knew how to be a grandson and a son and a brother and an uncle. But the father of a boy who would experience life so …

Continue Reading →

Several months ago my son badly bruised his heel while having a seizure. As he walked around the house before school, it was a pattern of grimace, smile, grimace, smile, grimace, smile, grimace, smile. Then when he found his special chair and got the weight off his foot, he sang.

It was amazing to watch. I don’t think I’ve seen anything like it before.

He wasn’t trying to put on a brave face; he isn’t capable of doing that. What he’s feeling inside comes out on his face and through his voice. His foot really hurt, and he was really happy.

His example puts me to shame. Most likely, I would have given into the temptation to let the world know how miserable I was over a bruised he…

Continue Reading →