Though I immediately longed to retrieve them, I grimaced upon realizing spoken words do not travel with erasers.

Before a group of adults who did not know my children, I flippantly referenced a child’s unseasonal wardrobe choices at that time. Laughter skipped around the living room like a bouncy ball. I chuckled uncomfortably but wept inside.

What did I just do?

I had spoken out of confusion and ignorance. In reality, my mouth uttered what my heart had already authored. The words easily escaped because God’s people, including me, can miss the worth and words he assigns to children. Perhaps we zealously undertake the rescue mission of motherhood while our hearts still cling to the names the world reserves for children: Chaos. Burdens. Busyness. Craziness.

But God bestows on them different names: Heritage. Power. Blessings. Gifts. Our children do not need to “grow up” to earn given titles. Rather, mothers’ hearts need to hear afresh God’s words about children.

God’s Words About Children

Children are who God says they are.

Children are a “heritage from the Lord” (Psalm 127:3) — a physical and spiritual inheritance. Our heavenly Father has passed on to his children the priceless, precious gift of our own children.

Children are a reward (Psalm 127:3), and God does not intend for us to set aside this reward to enjoy at some future date. Mothers don’t need to wait until children mature to fully cherish them — with the fullness and joyful noise they bring, and the needs they have for us to gladly fill, they are our reward right now.

Children are “like arrows in the hand of a warrior” (Psalm 127:4). Before adulthood, children rest in the quiver, safely kept and strategically loved. God frees mothers to tend the precious arrows, trusting that God will shape, sharpen, and aim them as he brings to completion the work he begins in their hearts (Philippians 1:6).

Children are a blessing (Psalm 127:4) — God’s provision to parents and models for our faith (Matthew 18:2–4; Luke 10:21). Perhaps when parents fixate on curing our children’s childishness, we suppress the very childlikeness Christ desires to extend to parents.

When parents default to describing moments with our children as chaotic, burdensome, or busy, we may start believing those moments define who they are. We reduce our precious children to a moment and our holy labor to herding cattle. If we learn now to treasure the titles children have been given, we won’t simply understand our children. We will embrace the very heart of God for them.

God’s News for Mothers

Children need to be children. Mothers may be tempted to see children through the eyes of a season or struggle, but God grants delight now to souls saturated in his terms of endearment for them. And embracing the truth about children — receiving them in Jesus’s name — is one way we receive more of Christ (Mark 9:37).

“Children are who God says they are.”

We receive our children in Jesus’s name as we gladly spend ourselves for them now (2 Corinthians 12:14–15). And a mother cannot spend her soul without spending her body. So to our children we surrender our eyes, arms, chests, and shoulders. Sometimes children just need Mom’s presence and voice, or perhaps the freedom to braid our hair or fashion our face like modeling clay. And growing children who desire more relationship invite mothers into fresh seasons of sharing our whole selves (1 Thessalonians 2:8), including post-bedtime time that once was “me time.” Intentional family rhythms and connection with individual children allow moms (and dads) to delight now in our children’s all-too-short seasons.

You are free to receive your children by joyfully filling needs in the varying forms they appear. If we try to control the way they come, children may learn not to come to us — or to Christ — at all.

Watching Our Mouth

The little children stood in Jesus’s presence before they perched on his lap. They would have heard his rebuke of the disciples: “Let the children come to me; do not hinder them” (Mark 9:14). Perhaps they squealed or clenched their fists by their faces because they had just gotten the green light to the King’s throne. God is most glorified in children when they are most satisfied in him. And they must have been more than satisfied with what he said about them.

Our weighed words honor our children, exalt Christ, and cast light in a world that often pities mothers and denigrates children (Proverbs 15:28). The mother who speaks the truth about children has the power of life and death (Proverbs 18:21), the blessing of providing “sweetness to the soul” who does not love Christ (Proverbs 16:24). Tell the world you aren’t busy or burdened; you’re blessed. Tell the world they aren’t chaos; they’re Christ’s. Tell the world they aren’t an inconvenience; they’re an inheritance.

Whether children’s behaviors elicit compliments or pity, a mother wields the power to tell the truth about them: They are a heritage, power, blessings, and gifts through all moments. And a cheerful countenance when our children surround us may jumpstart our “defense to anyone who asks” why hope — not chaos — rules our hearts (1 Peter 3:15).

Maybe a mother speaks highly of children before the world but lets her guard down with other believers. We may forget God calls us to something better than humor and relatability. Even at other times, when we walk through a challenging season that requires thoughtful counsel, we don’t want to be the gossips who betray a confidence but the trustworthy ones who honor our children in our speech (Proverbs 11:13). Thoughtful parameters decided beforehand with husbands (and even older children) allow mothers to seek counsel or offer encouragement to others without compromising honor and trust.

And our children are listening to what we say about them. We guard our children’s hearts when we guard our own mouths. Even the gospel that we share with others may become precious to our children too if they believe — from our words — that they are precious to us.

A mother’s words about her children may be her most effective gospel witness to the world, to believers, and to her children.

For Children’s Sake

One day, we will sit in quiet, empty homes, and we will long for the fullness of the days we live now. But we do not need to wait until the joyful noise stops bouncing off the walls to embrace the names of our children in the heart of our God.

During a private moment at just the right time, I will tell the story to my child of the words I spoke and seek forgiveness. I will testify of the goodness of God to teach me the real truth about children. With other mothers, I will declare,

I am glad to give you my time. I am glad to give you my sense of personal space. I am glad to offer you my quiet, my sacrifice, my life. I am honored to be your mother. I will hold you in my heart and arms and quiet your emotions I may not understand. I will sing to you and sing over you because that is God’s heart for me. And when my flesh and heart fail, God, whose strength and portion are mine, will remind me of the truth about you. You are a gift. You are a reward. You are a heritage. You are a blessing.

You are who God says you are.