What Can I Do to Help My Parents Stay Together?
The following is an edited transcript of the audio.
My parents are both believers and have been married 30 years. Recently my mom moved out and is very bitter. What can I do to help them as a son?
It's interesting that the mom moved out here and it's a son we're talking about, because that creates a special dynamic with the dad.
Lots of things can be done.
The first thing I'm thinking about is to pray, which is obvious.
O God, humble them and open their hearts. Make them willing to hear anything that I might say.
Second, I don't know who is sinning here mainly. Did Dad drive her out with abuse? Or did she leave in arrogant preference for another man? I don't know.
All of those things are going to affect how he responds. But he would try to encourage his mom not to lose her faith, to be strong, to humble herself, and to be willing to work through counseling—that is, try to get them both to pursue. Don't encourage their ongoing, long-term separation; but encourage their efforts at reconciliation.
And thirdly, if he's old enough, and he's strong enough, I think he should get in their face. You know, get in dad's face: "Why did you do what you did?" Or, "Mom, Mom, this isn't right!" And try to point them to biblical truths to Christ as the answer to their pain.
And you do it with a submissive, humble, childlike manner. You know, to say, "Mom and Dad, you've reared me. I am who I am, and I am heartbroken that this is happening to you."
There is a spirit in which you go when you are going to do a kind of rebuking to a parent. There's a spirit of humility and lowliness that is possible.
© 2015 Desiring God Foundation. Distribution Guidelines
Share the Joy! You are permitted and encouraged to reproduce and distribute this material in physical form, in its entirety or in unaltered excerpts, as long as you do not charge a fee. For posting online, please use only unaltered excerpts (not the content in its entirety) and provide a hyperlink to this page. For videos, please embed from the original source. Any exceptions to the above must be approved by Desiring God.
Please include the following statement on any distributed copy: By John Piper. ©2015 Desiring God Foundation. Website: desiringGod.org