The Mom God Isn’t Calling You to Be
“I’m so sorry I’m late.” As my son climbed into our minivan, my apology felt weak. I had misjudged the time — again. I didn’t leave any margin as I hurried to finish a project at home, so when another child needed care, the situation delayed me from picking up my waiting son. Then I hit extra traffic en route. Mom guilt weighed heavily on me as I realized running late was a pattern for me, even though it’s one I had hoped to avoid as a parent.
Many strategies and tools help us stay on schedule. Calendars, to-do lists, timers, alarms, and even a phone call from a friend can keep us accountable and remind us of our priorities and responsibilities. These tools serve me well, and I’ll keep using them. But even when I allow myself an extra fifteen to thirty minutes, say no to the extra chore, and keep a waiting child’s interests in mind (Philippians 2:3–4), there’s no guarantee I’ll arrive on time. First, I’m not in control. Any number of circumstances could interrupt my best-laid plans. What’s more, I’m limited. I get tired and forgetful. As much as I try to stay organized, I can’t always keep all the details straight.
Apologizing to my son was the right step, and he graciously forgave me. But here’s more good news to address the mom guilt that you and I feel: Only God is God. Only he is sufficient to meet both our needs and our children’s needs. Although he created us in his image, God’s omniscience, eternality, and power belong to him alone — and he promises to carry us when we fall (Psalm 37:24). So let God be God, and aim to be like him in the ways that you can be.
Let God Be God
Moms juggle so many responsibilities. Maybe you rock at time management, but you struggle to keep your house clean. Studying who God is and who we aren’t offers great encouragement to moms, because even though we might try to do it all, only God always completes his to-do list. God created us not as his equals but as creatures designed to depend on him (Genesis 1–3).
God declared to Israel there is no other like him: Only God is God (Deuteronomy 4:39). He reveals his true character in Scripture and ultimately through his Son, Jesus Christ, who “is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of all creation” (Colossians 1:15). Among God’s many attributes, some are unique to him (what theologians call “incommunicable”), and others he shares with us through the Holy Spirit (called “communicable”). Only God is self-existent and self-sufficient. He alone is all-powerful, all-knowing, and present everywhere. No one else is sovereign, eternal, incomprehensible, or unchangeable the way God is.
From pressures within and without, we can be tempted to co-opt God’s incommunicable attributes. We can try to be sovereign, striving to control uncertain situations or even our children’s behavior and speech. With the rise of digital technology, we can pretend to be all-knowing; it’s easy to ask an AI bot any question. We can think and act as if human self-sufficiency is a virtue instead of identifying its root: disguised pride.
Eventually, we reach our limits, and our meager efforts fail us. Real hope and peace reside not in false ideas of omnipotence but in surrender. We lean into God’s sovereignty. We trust that his watchful eye always presides over our children. We depend on God for his wisdom and strength instead of mustering our own.
“Even though we might try to do it all, only God always completes his to-do list.”
Ultimately, God’s incommunicable attributes encourage me. They lift the burden of doing it all — and doing it all flawlessly — off my shoulders. Given my propensity to squeeze too much into too little time, it’s particularly comforting to know that God is eternal, so I don’t have to be. Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, over the course of a lifetime may never be enough for me to accomplish my plans, but as “the Alpha and the Omega, the first and the last,” without beginning or end, God lives outside the constraints of time (Revelation 22:13). With him, “one day is as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day” (2 Peter 3:8). As he is faithful and true, I can always depend on him — and so can my children.
Be Like God in the Ways You Can Be
God communicates — or shares — other aspects of his character with his children. God is holy, loving, merciful, just, good, patient, generous, and faithful. We will never attain the fullness of God’s character, but as believing women, through the Holy Spirit we can grow and bear fruit in God’s communicable attributes — and we should.
You’ve probably seen a bride wear a veil on her wedding day. Maybe you even wore one yourself. While the veil covers a bride’s face, she can’t see clearly, but when her veil is lifted, she sees her groom face to face. Moses wore a veil after he met with God on Mount Sinai because the Israelites could not bear to behold the glory of the Lord (Exodus 34:29–33; 2 Corinthians 3:7). The apostle Paul draws upon this imagery to describe what it’s like when we turn to Christ. No longer does Scripture appear blurry, but the Holy Spirit reveals God’s glory in a way we’ve never seen it before. Now, as believing women, “We all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another” (2 Corinthians 3:18).
As we behold the glories of Christ, we become more like him. We start to think, talk, and act like Jesus. We start to want what Jesus wants; things that once appealed to us don’t any longer. Dependent on the Lord, abiding in him, with his life-giving sap running through us, we bear fruit that matches his character: “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control” (Galatians 5:22–23). God’s very patience in us enables us to respond more patiently than before. God’s very love in us flows to our families. Not perfectly, but with increasing measure, we reflect our Lord as we relate to our spouses, children, friends, neighbors, church members, and coworkers.
As Christian mothers, it’s our privilege and duty to teach our children about God, his character, and his ways. We’re called to show our children what it means to follow Jesus and become more like him (Deuteronomy 6:7). But God isn’t calling us to be perfect moms who always show up on time and have everything together. Instead, as forgiven moms, our mission is to point our children to our perfect Savior. When we surrender to him, God can use even our weakness and sin to magnify his attributes. Then we help our children understand how much we all need Jesus, the only sufficient Savior.
