Gossip and the Words of God

If gossip didn’t taste good, we wouldn’t gossip.

The other day, I nearly forwarded (what I saw as) a silly message from a friend. How ridiculous of her! I thought as I selected my husband’s name as the recipient. But before I could press “send,” my thumbs froze. God’s grace had numbed them with the needle of conviction. Then he thumped my heart on the head with a question: Why? Why would I talk this way — in secret, with equal parts pride and disdain — about another?

With a twinge of shame, I realized the answer. It’s the same answer for the person poised over a cruel text, the person murmuring a nasty word, and the person eager to read cruel texts and hear nasty words: “The words of a whisperer are like delicious morsels; they go down into the inner parts of the body” (Proverbs 26:22).

We gossip, and entertain others’ gossip, because gossip tastes good.

The Death-Cap Mushroom of the Mouth

Read the Bible for just a few minutes, and we know the kind of meal gossip makes for God. Scripture calls the whisperer a friend-separator (Proverbs 16:28), a “simple babbler” to avoid like raw meat covered in mold (Proverbs 20:19). One minute too long, and hot oil starts to smoke; one instance of whispering, and a whole house or neighborhood or office or school or church can catch fire with quarreling (Proverbs 26:20; James 3:5–6). Gossip isn’t like deep-fried foods, fine now and then. Gossip is like the death-cap mushroom — poisonous upon the first bite.

“We gossip, and entertain others’ gossip, because gossip tastes good.”

God promises to do more than distance himself from the one who chews on noxious rumors as if they were bubble gum. Through King David, we hear an echo of King Jesus’s anger against the habitual gossiper: “Whoever slanders his neighbor secretly I will destroy,” he says (Psalm 101:5). God despises the gossip — and the one who hankers to hear gossip: “An evildoer listens to wicked lips, and a liar gives ear to a mischievous tongue” (Proverbs 17:4). When Paul lists the deeds on which the unregenerate heart loves to feast, he mentions gossip and slander alongside murder and hatred of God (Romans 1:29–30). No wonder gossip disgusts God.

Yet how great a shock that too often, gossip doesn’t disgust us.

Catching All Crumbs

How can we Christians care more about keeping Red Dye 40, aspartame, or hot dogs from our tongues than we do rumors, secrets, and slander? We’ve let our flesh rule our mouths for far too long. If we are born again, already the Father has given our souls new taste buds — his Son’s very own perfect taste buds. (It was these taste buds that saved me from relishing the disparagement of a friend.) The trick is actually using them, daily, by the Spirit.

Surely, we use them by praying for God to “set a guard” and “keep watch” over any bitter use of our lips (Psalm 141:3). Christians take seriously the command to “let no corrupting talk come out of [our] mouths” (Ephesians 4:29) — not one morsel of gossip, not one crumb of a secret. In the fight to fully and finally stop slandering, biting our tongue is part of the battle (James 1:26).

At the same time, we can only bite our tongue for so long. Adults can be just as terrible as kindergarteners at the quiet game, and for good reason. God created us to speak! So, when our speech runs sour, we can’t vow just “never to talk again.” But we can plead with God to fill our speech with so much sweetness that there’s simply no room for vinegar. To remove gossip from our mouths, we both clamp down on deceit and command our words for good.

The Sweet Words We Need

To speak sweet words, we must know sweet words. And the sweetest of words all shoot from one root: the Scriptures.

The law of the Lord is perfect,
     reviving the soul;
the testimony of the Lord is sure,
     making wise the simple;
the precepts of the Lord are right,
     rejoicing the heart;
the commandment of the Lord is pure,
     enlightening the eyes;
the fear of the Lord is clean,
     enduring forever;
the rules of the Lord are true,
     and righteous altogether.
More to be desired are they than gold,
     even much fine gold;
sweeter also than honey
     and drippings of the honeycomb. (Psalm 19:7–10)

Only God’s words are perfect, sure, right, pure, true, clean, and righteous altogether — without qualification or nuance. God’s speech alone can be said to “[revive] the soul” and “[make] wise the simple” and “[rejoice] the heart” and “[enlighten] the eyes” and “[endure] forever.” The Bible outweighs the glitziest gold in worth; it outdoes the ooziest honeycomb in sweetness. What God has spoken in Scripture is just that good.

“The sweetest of words all shoot from one root: the Scriptures.”

Do we know his word like we know the smell of candied pecans roasting at a Christmas market? Can’t forget it. Do our souls wake up and want his word like our stomachs wake up and want their pancakes and coffee? Gotta have it. Do we roll his word around in our minds like we do our dinner menu? Planning on it. If we do, then God’s word won’t stay in his mouth; it will fill ours.

From His Mouth to Ours

And when it does, our mouths will bless others. First thing in the morning, our spouses will hear us praise him for a good night’s sleep or put our trust in him for the lack thereof. How great a trajectory for a wife’s day, for a husband to talk about God’s faithfulness right as he rolls out of bed. At the office, our coworkers will listen as we thank them — and thank them sincerely — for the smallest tasks. They’ll wonder where our gratitude comes from — “We’re in the middle of a deadbeat workday, of all things!”

We’ll send our friends more than memes and “Did you watch the game last night?” texts as we take every modern communication tool captive for the purposes of praying for one another (James 5:16), caring for one another (1 Corinthians 12:25), comforting one another (2 Corinthians 13:11), encouraging one another (1 Thessalonians 4:18), and instructing one another (Romans 15:14). How our default conversations with friends will shift, from talk of mere weather to mutual worship. At the dinner table, our children will hear us pray for God to satisfy our family with himself even more than with the homemade meal before us (Psalm 63:5). How a son’s life will change as he grows up and listens to his parents pray for more of God more deeply than they ask for more good things in this life.

All along, as we are busy praising and trusting and uplifting and thanking and praying, the urge to gossip will grow as stale as five-year-old cereal. (Trust me, it exists in certain unnamed pantries.) Compared to exalting God and encouraging others, gossip just doesn’t taste good anymore.